[Mission] Save No One: Revenge Of The Fallen II

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[Mission] Save No One: Revenge Of The Fallen II

#1

Post by platinum6ix » Mon Dec 31, 2018 2:49 am

Image


–Character Names:
•Armani La Vert
•Cider La Vert

–All Characters
•Espada
•Head fraccion
–Mission Title:
•Save no One: Revenge of The Fallen 2
–Mission Class Requested: A
—Mission Description:
6 hours ago after Armani's assistance was summoned by an Ex-Head fraccion, Diego Cephas, to help him regain control over the Woodland Sanctuary which is dreadfully under attack by a legion of unknown creatures. It was later revealed that Diego was the pulpit all along. He was brought to his knees but that wasn't the whole story.


Mystical creature

– Peikko
This is a fearsome creature similar to a giant, who can change
size, turn invisible. It harnessing the power of super strength.
Image
Last edited by platinum6ix on Fri Jan 25, 2019 5:41 am, edited 1 time in total. word count: 114

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Re: [Mission] Save No One: Revenge Of The Fallen II

#2

Post by platinum6ix » Sun Jan 06, 2019 1:08 pm

Armani La Vert: Midnight Velvet




As the tedious day sluggishly came to an end, there came the time to unwind the tenseness and rigidness of fragile bones but the current situation was one of no relaxation. The night rode in on a horse of pure midnight velvet, beckoned by the stars under the glow of a full moon. As the colours of the day laid to rest, perhaps dream of the morrow, the hillside became it's monochrome beauty, shapes that make an ever-changing, ever-present puzzle, question and answer united. In this night all was bound to become one, from rock to plant to animal, one promise of life awaiting the return of the sun. The darkness took everything. It sucked the glowing marrow from the fireflies, plucked the stars from the sky like a land baron fingering grapes from the vine. Not even the sun was spared as it plunged to the ground long ago as to never return. The blackness came and brought with it the haunts and spooks that gather at the doors of the mind at night pleading to be let in. 
The sun had gone to rest, the moon took it's place as the shadows began to surround everything. He loved the night, it always hid his flaws, his imperfections, the scars burned onto his flesh, the stabs of knives left behind. Only the moon guided him through the night. His calming presence made living entity shut their glance, their body quietly switching off; but he would let their soul run free. He could do the things he would never be allowed to do when the sun was out. He could do whatever he want…as his worries, his thoughts, silently burnt into smoke as they wonder through the endless night once more.
The silent woods had always look different at night. Even with glasses, everything has an unfamiliar slant to it. As if the daytime trees and flowers and stones had gone to bed and sent slightly more ominous versions of themselves to take their places.
The moon was new, the stars be-speckle the sky but cast nothing to lift the impenetrable inky blanket concealing everything under it's shine. The faint lingering lilac sky was lost into the shadow. As if it was a routine, the shimmering sparkles of star brilliantly silhouetted into the darkness. The moon under siege by stars seemed to lighten the night bringing forth stars that shone and hung in the blackness. The never ending blackness consumed everything. Except the stars which stood out like pebbles in front of a storm. Ever enduring these shone with the night cowered in a inky black sky. It seemed like guerrilla warfare as the darkness controlled the sky yet the stars controlled the gleaming spots of where they originated. The war continued across the constellations. A trembling gush of wind inaudibly drifted across the skyline.

The figure had always found the night to be a comforting presence. Out here, far faraway from the human world whose bright lights were still visible on the horizon, more satellites were visible than anywhere else, bar maybe the arctic circle. The darkness might have hidden most of mother nature, but it revealed it's most beautiful aspects.
While the luminous celestial body light the sky like snow-flakes in the night, yet appear still, like an old photograph. However, a smirk-less face was all he had even though a smile was let loose. Other than the little darkness and himself all that seemed to exist was the chilly wind that it's harsh bite could be felt through his cloak. He could feel the hairs on his arm raised and the bite of the wind had left it's mark in the form of small bumps that were nothing but sensations. The feel of the wind blown unto his hair into a tousled mane. Were he out there in space riding the limits of the known universe, they would be a choreographed blizzard. How the stars would move, the galaxies tumble and dart.


The cold onshore breeze blew right through his full-body white kimono and he bowed his head to one side, closing lashes weighed down with no pity to keep out a figure in his presence off his eyes. The dampness of the little sand made it's way though the woven fabric he wore underneath his garment covering the region from waist to ankles. His hair fell loose behind his face, tousled, tangled. Under the night sky it still appeared white as ever, streaks lost to the night. He could hear the waves lapping like the ticking of a more leisurely clock, but never revealing the time, never demanding that he move on.
Just as the starry night above was better than any software imitation in their era. There were lighter patches, clusters of faint and bold light, the constellations altered according to the time of year. Those were the same stars that greeted the ancients, the same ones that would be there in millions of years, the same ones that would be there till the end of time, and the same night sky stood an inky canopy of darkness freckled only by the fewest of stars, where just hours ago it had been a blue summer's day.


But for now, with his arms wrapped over his chest of a windswept resistance towards stress, and his head leaned gently to point his glaze to the empty sky, the starlight kept its familiar pattern. The constellations, who witnessed centuries and millennia just the same, watched over this tiny moment. When more light came from the night sky than the sun, he switched from his stationary position and walked over the little greens of the land as he paved his way to exist the vicinity. The vicinity was more of a little portion of land which the eye can comprehend in a single view. An open space with more of the color green to it. Trees were close-by but the old growth grew so thickly that there was no undergrowth at all. About his feet are trivial plants of the family Poaceae, and browned remnants of branches and needles that have fallen in the recent high winds. If there was a path there his presence might be hardly known under the night sky, so one would have to wend their way through the skinny trunks that grew so tall, racing for their share of the moon's rays. In places they are so thickly clumped, one might have to alter his or her path. The air had that smell of nature, woodland before rain, perhaps above the canopy there are clouds fit to burst. It was dark for this time of day, so perhaps soon the filtered light will be accompanied by water droplets.


The assassin liked to make a clean kill, and thus favored small arms over explosives as he walked out of the presence of Diego with no remorse or what so ever. The silent cry from his footsteps were as loud as a whisper, as silent as a lion's roar. It was a frequency only ample to the senses of a black beetle. A distance of near 5meters were covered from his motion but moments before he could point out an index finger to conjure a rift from the empty space, a phase of the weakest audibility was heard.

“We're...not...done!”

Those were painful words from the orifice of Diego. His face, so handsome in life was frozen, eyes open, mouth slacked, as he was propelled backwards and collapsed from the physical assault sustained from the blows of the Espada. His eyes held unto the Espada and in those fractions of seconds he was there and then believed to be gone, the hustle of the ages in training to avenge his defeat that had been his essence of living till the present day simply vanished out of thin air. With both kneels and chest on physical contact with the surface of the earth, Diego's body laid waste to the ground like a ghoulish mannequin. A hit tholed at a region close to the lower abdomen only left his internals, tissues, organs dysfunctional. Diego was left paralyzed. As body of cloud moved, even the passage of the light from the moon slowed and the sounds became as if underwater. Aside from the beat of his heart, no single muscle moved. That pounding inside beat a rhythm to the words of his down fall. The punch entered as if his skin was nothing, just meat, blood, and fragile bones, blasting a cavity in his back as it burst crimson into the faded day. But where there's a will there's a way, his life force wasn't gone. Diego's index finger twitched involuntarily like it had a mind of it's own.

“Don't look down on me...i said we're not done.”

Diego repeated himself once again with every inky drop of strength he had underneath his sleeves.
Not all wasn't gone. It wasn't much to say but it was ample considering the situation. Presence of reiatsu was still felt running underneath his skin. Diego grasped for air in the midst of his downfall despite the odds that his chances of survival were frozen in absolute zero. He had seen better days, he was once a big bug, a person of some importance during his days at Hueco Mundo. The most impressive aspect of his dark lifestyle was the ability to never give up or back down even when the odds are not favourable. All that was left of the blood that had once flowed thick and scarlet in her veins was clasped in his callused fingers. The blood flowed like a lazy river, gushed with sickening determination from his stomach region, as if his own heart sought to pump it from his body, out of the exposed wounds. It moved like so much red gravy across the little potion of the landscape and sank down into the earth interrupting the color of the once green land. The Espada was impressed the very moment Diego managed to rise to his feet. It took almost forever but it was impressive. Every joint in his body went numb but he stood his ground anyway. He pressed snugly against his opened wounds to stop the free flowing surge of sticky blood but no matter the pressure he applied the blood still gushed between his fingers and oozed under his hand. The violet blood dripped down his arm and soaked the cloth material of his attire, but yet, even though pain fluctuated on his face, the defiant stance and angry crease through his forehead indicated he wasn't about to go down without a fight.

High above was an eagle; the cold air was being beaten by colossal black feathers, darker even than the crude oil that had been naturally buried underneath the ground. The eagle dominated the sky as it's birth right, spreading wings as broad as they are black. It's head looked white in the moonlight, as bright as the clouds it glides between. Yet in it's talons it carried a twisted piece of junk, rusted enough to give it an earthy hue from far below. It was the sound of that eagle that gave the deadly sign, like the sound of a ringed bell which screamed “Round two (2).”

“DON'T LET YOUR GUARD DOWN OVER A MINOR VICTORY. THIS IS JUST THE BEGINNING.”

Diego yelled out loud on top of his voice regardless of the damage to his internals. Surprisingly audible, it echoed through the silent night with no compunction, disturbing the very land, the very vicinity they were in. With both palms clenched right in front of his chest, he took a praying stance.

“Renacimiento hueco...(Hollow rebirth)!”


It was nothing more than a word but the power within came along with a sudden burst of green spiritual energy that gave into the atmosphere ripping the very fabric of space. The kinetic wave travelled from the center of where Diego stood as it pushed back everything standing in it's path to a near five (5) meter radius. The only thing left was a dilapidated terrain that had been chopped off like it was a feeble material, like it was nothing but a candy crushed. Nevertheless, all that was just an alteration to the environment for what was yet to come. Regardless of the fact that he always had his heart in his boots, his potential had always been hidden from the outside world, but at that moment in time he was at the verge of revealing his triumph card. The Espada thought the ex head fracción was already done for, but little did he know that the impossible was yet to come. It was identical to a puff of vapour formed when liquid phase changes to gas phase under high temperature which was gradually released from his opens wound. To break the ice, a feat comparable to a reverse effect occurred to the fatal injury the previous head fraccion had sustained. Out of the blue, Diego's internal organs began to regenerate over time. Damaged cells that were destroyed were then restored in a matter of seconds. Dead tissues that had long been disintegrated were then replaced in proximity.

“What just happened? I believe crippled you, I thought I rubbed you off your limbs.”

Left to ponder over what just occurred right in front of his eyes, the Espada took a step slightly backward in response to the dexterous skill displayed. The point of greatest intensity he has ever seen an arrancar achieve was the notable high speed regeneration; the ability to regenerate any part of the body except for the brains and internal organs. The repair of damage can start quickly and finish in few seconds. However, despite the many benefits the regenerative capability has, many Hollows choose to abandon the power when becoming Arrancar in a trade for greater capabilities. Although it's ability to regenerate is indeed powerful it is not without flaws; the brains and internal organs can’t be regenerated.


At that moment, a spatial tear appeared in their presences. The occasional hoot of a hidden owl was one among the few sounds to permeate the silence until a chorus of slapping footsteps and crunching gravel echoed angrily into the emptiness of the night. As a voice quickly followed, the owl ommited a screech of protest and took flight.
Last edited by platinum6ix on Fri Jan 25, 2019 5:40 am, edited 2 times in total. word count: 2443

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Re: [Mission] Save No One: Revenge Of The Fallen II

#3

Post by platinum6ix » Fri Jan 25, 2019 5:45 am

[center]Cider La Vert: Nightmare[/center]




He came in unexpectedly but it was at the nick of time. A sudden break in thin air occurred at a vertical distance just high above ground level. While having an identical trait to that of a senkaimon used by the Shinigami to transport between worlds, it had a different feature of blackness to it. The empty space that was left asunder, widened to a near 3ft magnitude only to reveal a humanoid figure in an all white butler's outfit. The energy control to conjure up a spatial rift was lacking in potency as it took longer than usual to fully emerge in a size capable of spitting out a 185cm giant. In spite of that, the figure was no giant. He wasn't even close to that. To the naked eyes, he had the semblance of a slender-honed mensch, and alot young than he appeared. Willowy and without a bust he could pass for twenty one (21) of an average human, but in truth he was more than a hundred (100). With mischievous features and short blue hair he was considered "Elegant." He was a tall fellow, lean but not as a greyhound, flat but not as a pancake, he had an in color pale skin comparable to that of his superior, the Segunda Espada. Deep-set were those blue eyes that looked out from a face that was burned to the color of a brick. His nose was straight and minuscule, cheeks well hollowed; the face was cold and grim, it had all the features that breed bad blood. He commonly dresses in a butler's outfit, which consists of a trouser, a six-button double-breasted tailcoat, and a vest. But they were all white except for the grey vest.


Two bloodlust creatures were already present before him, the Espada, and the latter who was coated in blood stains but didn't seem disturbed about it. The enormous level of dense green energy escaping from his person was beyond the comprehension to his arrival. Similarly to his superior Armani La Vert, he had the sigil crest but on his shirt cuffs and tie. He also had white gloves on, a pocket watch, and a chained silver lapel pin bearing the sigil crest.

“Apologies my lord. Right from the human world i wasn't able to pinpoint the Woodland sanctuary so the gates lead me here due to my poor dexterity.”

A feedback he gave to his master who commented on his arrival.

Styled in pigtails with two black bands tied to a portion of her long, straight, and golden-blonde hair, she was a tall and slender feminine. Without losing the challenge to nature's beauty, she appeared in a creamy but Gothic outfit and black paints to her nails and lips. Cider, a dedicated soldier to the Segunda Espada took the opportunity to study her eyes. In the first couple of seconds, he'd labeled them "Grey." If he was feeling particularly poetic, he called them "Silver." Neither word did them justice. They were so solid, so bright, the exact lustrous color of a polished shard of metal. If one could look closer, like he was just now, they would see the swirls of glittering onyx black and tinges of blue at the edges. They weren't monochrome or boring. That had simply been his terrible judgement. They were beautiful. But more importantly, he couldn't sense energy from her reiatsu tank. Perhaps she was dexterous enough to suppress all that she had underneath her sleeves to display falsifiability to the minds of those who would let their guard down or peradventurely, he had deficiency in control than her.


And then it came like a flash in a pan, a gigantic creature rained like a lightning bolt from the sky. Akin to the other entity that was once brought to it's knees by the twins, Selene and Soledad, it was also similar to the same entrance it made at the vicinity of the Woodland sanctuary. Clad in black fur that seem thicker than woven fabric, the degree of muscularity in his forearms were visible out of abnormality. The colossal was no dwarf as it was nearly 9ft tall in spite of it's massive size. The very minute the beast deliberately lost altitude due to the influence of gravity on the land's surface, the impact it made to the ground with both fist clenched only left the terrain in a state of disrepair – large potion of the land was left in shattered rubbles as the vibrations shook the grounds. At that point, the entire meeting was bound to go south with no possible sign of truce. From a distance of almost 15m where the beast landed, it sank all it's fingers into the ground pulling out a huge mass of debris which was capable of completely burying at least five (5) human bodies. Tossing the enormous body of rock to the wind, it came for Cider. Be it sonido, all those within range flicked with ease but Cider stood his ground, widened his feet a little and braced himself for impact. He applied only a minor force to his right arm stretched to make physical contact with the massive boulder. While it was a direct hit that had the momentum of the debris conserved, the aftermath of the pernicious collision did nothing but shatter the debris into particles. With the frequency of a loud bang sufficient to deaf the ears and sand particles capable of blinding the eyes, the atmosphere was dense with ashes. It wasn't distinct nor was it faint, a sticky, a pinky, seed sized object abruptly found it's way to Cider's feet. The moment of truth came. A flash broke out, instantaneously lifting and spreading the incandescent radioactive gasses, and then a great gush of flame rose. A column of pure hydrogen must have rushed up into the vacuum as it released a destructive explosion and great rags of fire changing from red to violet; a disastrous blast of flame that came only to consume all in it's path at a radius of nearly ten meter (10m). The blinding flash came from the point where the wave burst and a white cloud filled the air. While he was sent airborne in a backward motion gaining at least fifteen meter (15m) altitude, the lateral to his outfit was ripped to shreds by the explosion. There was no dull moment as the dark creature went straight for Cider who was lost in the wind, and in a bodily force it's palm met with the face of the arrancar in a clenched manner. Brute strength was the bed rock of it's dominance, Cider was flung back to the bedraggled surface of the land like he was no different from a mere sack of meat. Then it happened like a bolt from the blue, the very same ilk seed sized objects were already concealed in multiples as land mines waiting to be stomped on. Like a fallen angel, so did Cider descended on his rear unto the death trap. From a mile away, one could sight a lancelike ray of blue-white light shot up into the gathering dusk – a clump of five rays, really, from five deep shafts in an irregular pentagon, blended into one by the distance. In an instant there was a blinding flash, the second blinding flash, like sheet-lightning, and a huge ball of varicolored fire belched upward, leaving a series of smoke-rings to float more slowly after it. The outburst was five times greater than the last. The beast landed on it's feet with rage and adrenaline running through it's veins. Beasts, they all have the thrill of the kill, the satisfaction of consuming their prey. They have no second voice, no positive force to bother them, asking them to be good. They have a peace of mind other poor creatures do not. They don't feel empathy for their victims, or guilt for keeping what's theirs. At that moment, it roared to scare off it's prey and the loud cry echoed through the land clearing the dust that had risen from the aftermath of the explosion. Cider was found partially buried by the debris, his breath seemed to stutter in his lungs before he let it go, feeling the tension drain from his body and the scratch on his left cheek. He let out a burning ball of air that was searing the walls of his lungs. His breathing returned to normal and he felt as if he could answer the question,“What was that just now?!”


The presence of the slender feminine never went home unacknowledged. She stood firm on high hills with a smirk on her face that revealed nothing but bad faith.
At first sight, three sticky pinky balls but of fist size were swirling right above her left palm at random motion under the voluntary influence of her fingers. It unveiled the plot that she was the pulpit behind the explosions all along. She must have attained a latter form as she looked different from awhile ago. A white mask encased half her face down to the left arm like some sort of hardened gauntlet.

“Is it just me or you are deliberately taking a beating from a dog and some girl?!”

It was a voice audible enough for one of Cider's senses to perceive. However, he was fit as fiddle regardless of the fact that he was thrown into cold water. Unfortunately for his targets, they were already printed in his black books and their fate had already sailed on the same boat. Marked by a furious speed that left two afterimages in his wake with the latter to keep the beast at bay, Cider appeared before the feminine in a crouched manner without a moment lost in the script. Before she could respond to the celerity that was quicker than her very own senses, Cider delivered a simple but effective attack by aiming only for her legs and thus knocking her off equilibrium with a single rapid rotational kick. The move was succeeded with an upward kick even before she could realise she was sailing on false colors the whole time with her gaze locked on the afterimage. A dreadful kick from the ground that was without delay converted into a blow sent her to the sky like a flapless bird with some ruptured ribs. He never had the intentions of letting his effort wash down the drain. With vast speed and immense strength, he followed after her only to submit a terrifying drop down blow at a level of destruction capable of destroying mountains. A body of wave conjured by his strike travelled and then vanished after a long distance. With her body concealed in a crater created by the impact, her creamy white dress was stained deep scarlet and she breathed her last.

“You're next.”

Cider left without a backward glance. All of a sudden a red light engulfed the beast and the deceased, before Cider could take a defensive stance, they vanished from sight like it was some sort of instantaneous teleportation.
Last edited by platinum6ix on Fri Jan 25, 2019 5:47 am, edited 2 times in total. word count: 1885

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Re: [Mission] Save No One: Revenge Of The Fallen II

#4

Post by platinum6ix » Fri Jan 25, 2019 5:54 am

Armani La Vert: Midnight Velvet (cont.)




At that moment, a spatial tear appeared in their presences. It took longer than usual and the descendant of the La-Vert family knew it was no other than his half brother, who's also a brother-in-arms.
“Should I assume you're late or early?” He said in respect to Cider's arrival as the gate closed in a gradual calm.


“Apologies my lord. Right from the human world i wasn't able to pinpoint the Woodland sanctuary so the gates lead me here due to my low dexterity.”

For he knew the truth drilled into Cider's soul, so he accepted nothing but an unnecessary apology. An empty space ruptured, thus revealing yet a second gate. Fashioned in two braided plaits of hair on both sides of the head, a female unveiled herself, and then came a dark beast that descended from the clouds. With Armani's back against Cider's, they were both surrounded by the enemy.
Just hours ago a death would have been the headline news, to see a corpse would be something to seek the counsel of Las Noches about - no longer. 
Like a flicking technique, both Diego and his acclaimed rival, Armani, took flight at a vast progression high above ground level underneath the clouds. They both dashed backwards creating a horizontal distance of near thirteen meters (13m) away from each other. Armani was still marvelled over the unexplained theory Diego pulled to regenerate his internals. In spite of that, Diego was surprisingly able to keep up with his speed as they advanced to the sky as honed spiritual beings.

“Esfera de rayos....(Lightning spheres)!”

Upon the very command Diego tapped into the atrocity of his release, utilizing his element of lightning to conjure up countless blue spheres of dense electrical energy. The raging spheres were roughly fist size and they formed behind him like a huge wall filled with the properties of electrons and certainly other subatomic particles. At that time, coming in close range with the violent figure would only be detrimental to Armani for he did nothing but observe, perhaps he underestimated the lightning user. Only to tilt his head a bit to the left, he was able-bodied to evade a single energy sphere that broke through space disturbing it's fabric at a vicious rapidity. He reversed the position only to elude two other raging balls that clawed through both sides of his neck; a short burst of electrical discharge. At that instant, Armani knew his hearing had been impaired for he lost the sound of nature's creatures and the savage beast that toyed with Cider.
Diego accompanied his attack with another move as he quickly pulled out some sort of tangible material from his robe and crushed it in one squeeze, simultaneously mixing his reiatsu into the particles. “Nubes de Ceniza....(Ash cloud),” he uttered while moving his hand sideways to create a dense reiatsu filled ash. It was a negación technique used to not only rub the victim off their sight but also impair movements, and he succeeded the move by discharging all electric balls to neutralize the Espada. While Armani found it difficult to see through the stuffed atmosphere, he noticed his motion wasn't as free as usual. In a swift progression he still broke through the field of ashes in a backward motion to reach back to the grounds when sensed multiple heats of electricity homing. A second before Armani's foot could kiss the ground, he switched direction to put the chase to an end which led the electric spheres to met and obliterate a vast potion of the ground, wiping out the trees and all in it's path. He persistently moved horizontally towards Cider's position who was somewhat buried in wreckage.

“Is it just me or you are deliberately taking a beating from a dog and some girl?!”

The Segunda Espada spoke like it was a joke for he knew he himself would find the rate of survival at minimum should he fall under the wrath of Cider. While he caught his breath, not a smile creeped crawled onto his face and he wouldn't let it sit there. He returned his gaze to the moon only to find Diego's arm raised high with a lightning sphere of gigantic proportions, twice as large as his own body. He lowered his arm and the lightning energy tore through space like a metal bullet shot from a gun at high speed. It's vivid that the two special abilities of Diego's lightning constructs are sheer speed and homing capabilities. Before impact, the Espada left behind an imitation (a clone) of himself as a sacrifice to pull the lightning sphere into a false sense of security. The force of collision unleashed a massive shock wave that left the terrain in more ruins. Diego returned back to the surface of the land and to depict his facial expression was like depicting a blank sheet of paper set on fire. The rage of animosity that squeezed over his forehead was nothing but a thick stain.


Ten meters (10m) away from the Espada, Diego deployed yet another rage of spiritual pressure that could be felt kilometers away from his initial position.
“Linterna...(Lightning flash)!”

He discharged an abundant level of electricity through his entire body in exchange for an intensive bright light to disorientate his target's sense of sight. Armani's vision was once again hindered but before he could realize a thing or figure out a defensive move, his left arm had already been chopped off in a blink of an eye. A swift cut that was sharp enough to not only tear flesh but instantly breakthrough his power of permanence as if it posed no resistance. At once a fountain of red came from the wound, the ebb and flow in time with a terrified heart. The once scarlet blood that had oozed down the Diego's blade in thick droplets now spattered the peeling linoleum and had quickly darkened. It was a moment of silence, Armani watched as his arm dropped lifeless like a slayed meat. He recalled for a moment that not only did he lost sight of Diego but also failed to sense his movement. However, the theory behind the ability was only known to Diego for what he pulled had a more perfect trick to it. While he became light itself, his spiritual energy went temporary null and he's unable to use any other reiatsu tasked abilities. But more importantly, none of it all was compared to the instantaneous regeneration displayed earlier. Diego chuckled with his shoulders vibrating before bursting a queer laugh that spoke the once vacant mind. He returned his gaze to the Espada, “You don't get it, do you? After my departure all that was left was death. But however someone cared, and it's all thanks to him. All it took was sacrifices, a little modification here and there and boooom.... I am your worst nightmare.”

“Modification?!”“What modification?,” the Segunda legionnaire questioned Diego for his statements were all blue to him.

“Hollow rebirth! A high-tech advanced modification you can never live to comprehend. Not only does it heal lethal wounds, but also temporary boost one's physical attributes to it's apex. Strength, speed, stamina, name it, Armani. All powered at maximum.”
Everything summed up in few words, the ex-head fracciòn brought to light what he had underneath his sleeves along. Armani was caged up on tenterhooks. For an instant, half his body went numb and he fell to his left kneel. Tormented with what could have been and what should have been, words and dissatisfaction taunted him with a savage intensity. The images were so acute, so crystal clear, it was like living in the presence of another soul. Sharp pain lanced through his head but all he could do was to put up with the unpleasant. The Espada was left wide open and Diego took the advantage of the situation. It was a swift display of motion, Diego came forward dashing at full speed in an attempt to run his fist through the Espada's head. A tilt to the left was all the Espada did for he managed to keep up with Diego,“Sorry but I can't afford more injuries, negaciòn box.” His right palm met with Diego's chest before he could finish up the sentence. Diego was trapped and rendered helpless in some sort of energy cube, an alternate dimension. Armani prepared the move the moment he knelt to the ground to sail Diego into false colors. It was a dark small cube shape device that simulates negation fields by fusing some amount of reiatsu and projecting the device towards the target's hollow hole. It reacted with Diego's reiatsu, trapped and simultaneously shocking him but he only sustained little to no damage.

It came into view. A shadow that had long watched over the scenery right from the Woodland sanctuary. Perhaps it was the ability to bend light that disclosed his person from all naked eyes in reality. Nevertheless, not only that he was hidden from sight, his spiritual signature was simultaneously null, even to Armani's cognizance. Dressed in worn out rags and a small black hat that covered only the left eye, the 5.10ft figure possessed the ability to bring forth animations to live. “Sigh,” his right hand went over his head to adjust the dog bitten hat which revealed his red eye, while the other ocular was as black as burnt coal. He was not just odd, he looked twisted, filthy, and mentally unstable. To a noticeable degree, the rib bones at the chest region underneath his flesh made him look rather skinny than slender. While he had the ability to bring creatures to live, he also served as the life-force to such creations. Level of strength, stamina, and resistance to damage depended on the degree sacrificed to the creation while he, the puppeteer, would only remain vulnerable. He was solely responsible for the berserker, a hard nut to crack.
Faraway
In an underground lair far faraway from Las Noches or the Woodland sanctuary, a deep masculine voice spoke, “What's taking them so long? Summon them back.”
“Yes my lord,” a figure clad in black coat responded with no delay. He slammed both palms to the ground and there came a large druid marking on bright red light.
Armani La Vert: Midnight Velvet (cont.)
At the ruined landscape off the Woodland sanctuary, Armani caught his breath to ease the burden of discontent. While Diego remained trapped, a red illumination engulfed his body and in a flash, he was gone along with the savage beast and the likes.





The End
Last edited by platinum6ix on Thu Jan 31, 2019 6:37 am, edited 1 time in total. word count: 1817

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Phantom-T
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Re: [Mission] Save No One: Revenge Of The Fallen II

#5

Post by Phantom-T » Thu Feb 28, 2019 7:17 am

Review
Length
WC:6,145
Nicely done here, you really invested a lot of words into this, and also divided them into parts, which i liked. Your write up was also nicely organized though it could have done with more space between some of your paragraphs. Based on word counts alone I would say this has the frame of a solid B rank mission and as such I commend you on this.
Wordplay

Your word play was quite average, i noticed some interesting phrases and lines and some other narrative sentence structure which made it clear what you were trying to portray. However, some areas had you overemphasizing on particular concept (as can be noticed in your first few paragraphs) which slowly snuffed out the light from the content of the story. In this case i can only add that long explanatory passages, evens beautifully written tend to cause more harm than good in a narrative work, especially during the beginning of your work. I suggest you learn to trim down some areas of your work to avoid situations like this in the future.

Also, as is usually the case with works of this length, I noticed some inconsistencies in spelling, tenses and in some case the entire sentence structure which i advice you look into more often before submission.
As a voice quickly followed, the owl ommited ([SP:omitted] [CW:emitted]) a screech of protest and took flight.
Not all wasn't (CW:was) gone.
The silent cry (CW:cries [transitive verb])from his footsteps wereas loud as a whisper, as silent as a lion's roar .

Luckily for you, this was not a domineering occurrence.
Finally, Some of your paragraphs were bulky and could've done with more segments, while some were not properly spaced making it appear a little bit un-kept in most situations.

Story line Creativity & Consistency
The story line was a bit shallow, there was no full insight about what was really going on or more so why the situation turned out to be so intense. From an observer point of view, there was a lot of mysticism with this story which introduced us to a fading battle which quickly turned on its tail and eventually vanished before both parties’ motives could be determined. However, I did notice this was a second issue to an ongoing story and as such will only advice you occasionally bring into light certain details which would shine light on why the current situations was as it is.

Creativity was great, the main fact this was an ongoing arc for Armani and Cedar proved that much, I loved what you did with Diego as a character. He seemed to understand himself and his opponent’s character. For someone who had faced and lost to Armani before, I think he carried himself just fine.
Cedar was also well played; he employed his speed interestingly well and was also headstrong. Also I enjoyed the way you linked Armani to Cedar during the battle clearing up previous confusions.

Consistency to me was average. You seemed to have a good scope of what you wanted and what you were going for. However, i noticed you cut off parts in-between scenes, which made it hard to understand what was going on at times. Moving from Armani and Diegos scene to Cedars entrance, then all over to Cedars battle before returning us to her entrance for Armanis part of the bout had me confused for a while and I suggest you find a better way to harmonize different battle scenes to play out in one full sweep.

Power play
large potion of the land was left in shattered rubbles as the vibrations shook the grounds. At that point, the entire meeting was bound to go south with no possible sign of truce. From a distance of almost 15m where the beast landed, it sank all it's fingers into the ground pulling out a huge mass of debris which was capable of completely burying at least five (5) human bodies. Tossing the enormous body of rock to the wind, it came for Cider. Be it sonido, all those within range flicked with ease but Cider stood his ground, widened his feet a little and braced himself for impact. He applied only a minor force to his right arm stretched to make physical contact with the massive boulder. While it was a direct hit that had the momentum of the debris conserved, the aftermath of the pernicious collision did nothing but shatter the debris into particles.


Nicely done here, you gave good account of cids Strength plus durability. There was nothing wrong with how he carried himself here and later on during the battle.

The Segunda Espada spoke like it was a joke for he knew he himself would find the rate of survival at minimum should he fall under the wrath of Cider. While he caught his breath, not a smile creeped crawled onto his face and he wouldn't let it sit there. He returned his gaze to the moon only to find Diego's arm raised high with a lightning sphere of gigantic proportions, twice as large as his own body. He lowered his arm and the lightning energy tore through space like a metal bullet shot from a gun at high speed. It's vivid that the two special abilities of Diego's lightning constructs are sheer speed and homing capabilities. Before impact, the Espada left behind an imitation (a clone) of himself as a sacrifice to pull the lightning sphere into a false sense of security. The force of collision unleashed a massive shock wave that left the terrain in more ruins. Diego returned back to the surface of the land and to depict his facial expression was like depicting a blank sheet of paper set on fire. The rage of animosity that squeezed over his forehead was nothing but a thick stain.

It was nice you remembered to introduce this here, even though more rest was expected for Armani who had just finished a fight and had barely had his rest before being drawn into another fight. However, I also noticed he only moved to evade his opponent’s attack, which was a great move for someone at his endurance level.

With that said I don't know much about Diego and the other Npc's used, but I believe the use of their ability was within reason and well played out.

Mission Grade: "B"
Last edited by Phantom-T on Thu Feb 28, 2019 8:22 am, edited 4 times in total. word count: 1086

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